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Venture Inward
May/June 2004
by Amy Betit and Mary Elizabeth Lynch
Leadership and Peacemaking
No matter what our position in life, each of us can be a leader and a
worker for peace. To be a leader, it is not necessary to have a high-up
position, or to be in any way in charge of others. An effective leader,
working for the good of all, has command over self, rather than
needing to command others. A peacemaker sees the potential for good in
each individual and for a constructive solution to each situation encountered.
Authentic leadership is about empowerment of others, not power
over others.
We have seen throughout history and in our own lives the effects of
misdirected leadership, or leadership with self-aggrandizement as a
goal. Above all, leaders and peacemakers need to be serving the higher
good; they need to have processes for cultivating self-knowledge and
the ability to see beyond the boundaries of their personal limitations
and biases.
Self-knowledge includes not only awareness of one's feelings and thoughts,
but knowledge of one's particular cultural, political, and gender biases.
That means self-knowledge regarding what motivates our actions, what
we project onto others (both good and bad), and what our strengths and
weaknesses are. It also means knowledge of our spiritual beliefs and
how they might differ from other people's beliefs. Self-knowledge includes
awareness of our values, ideals, joy, and creativity, in addition to
our "hot" buttons where fear, anger, and sadness lie. Carl
Jung wrote in his autobiography, Memories, Dreams and Reflections,
"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding
of ourselves." There are many paths to self-knowledge, but each
one requires consistent practice.
Self-knowledge, however, is only one ingredient of leadership and peacemaking.
When Edgar Cayce was asked in a reading how the questioner could prepare
for leadership, his reply was: "By prayer and meditation. It is
innate and natural, yet the basis of service must be as of the ideal;
not merely idealistic for that indicates unattainable, but "be
ye perfect, even as I am perfect' said He. This then is in purpose,
in intent, in hope, in application. This is the manner to attain to
leadership." Another leading thinker about the spiritual roots
of leadership makes a parallel point. In his book. Servant Leadership,
which has been a classic in the field since 1977, Robert K. Greenleaf
presents the concept of a leader as first and foremost a servant: "The
servant-leader is servant first... It begins with the natural feeling
that one wants to serve, to serve first. Then conscious choice brings
one to aspire to lead. That person is sharply different from one who
is leader first, perhaps because of the need to assuage an unusual
power drive or to acquire material possessions."
The qualities of peacemaking and leadership can be present in any mundane
situation of life, not just the big decisions. Each time that we encounter
an irritation or a conflict, we have a choice to make. We can either
fan the flames and stimulate the conflict to grow intense, or we can
actively seek the "message in the conflict" and work to find
a peaceful and creative solution. Making the peaceful choice will not
mean avoiding conflict, or avoiding strong and difficult emotions. Often
making the peaceful choice will mean heading directly into the fray,
in order to hear the message or messages inherent in the difficulty.
That is a powerful kind of leadership that our world desperately needs.
To understand this process of peacemaking and leadership, however,
it's important to examine the conflicts we bump into in daily life.
They may at first seem to be exclusively a matter of things going wrong
in the world around us, the outer world in disharmony. However, with
even a small bit of self-examination we will discover the inner component
of the conflict. And once that inner component is understood and resolved,
then a leader can work to bring a peaceful resolution to an outer conflict.
Nowhere is this process of inner / outer peacemaking more evident than
in our relationships. Each of us has a responsibility for the relationships
in our lives, starting with our close friendships and moving out to
our work, community, country, and global relationships. In that sense
we are all leaders if we are willing to take on the role of peacemaker.
And it's not easy to do because there are obstacles. For example, it's
easy to forget the sanctity of each human being, and when we lose deep
respect for each person's life, then peacemaking and authentic leadership
disappear also. And so we must return frequently to the practices we
have established to remind ourselves of that sanctity, and to clear
our own emotions. Then we must step forward as we are called, to help
bring peace and harmony into all situations.
The leader as peacemaker is able to see conflict as a positive force
in the universe, the coming together of diversity and difference to
potentially create something new. Conflict occurs where there is
a need for a solution, a fresh, new solution, one that has never been
seen before, and one that could not possibly arise as a result only
of a one-sided view of life. Seen this way, nothing valuable happens
if the conflict - remember, both inner and outer - is simply
squelched or repressed. Then no wisdom, no revelation of the new, can
come out of it Genuine leaders see how to deal with conflict in such
a way that new information and understanding are allowed to emerge,
and hence a magnificent new solution emerges.
In his book A Path with Heart, Jack Kornfield writes of "stopping
the war within." That means, first of all, to become aware
of the war. In other words, if we pay attention, we can hear what each
of the sides in the conflict is saying. But are we able to listen deeply
to all sides, or are we quickly inclined to judge one over the other?
Can we embrace the war without trying to help one side win over the
other?
Perhaps even more challenging to the potential leader/ peacemaker is
the emotional aspect. Can we accept the feelings that come with conflict
- or, harder still for some people, can we accept the feelings of fear,
sadness, or anger when the war is stopped? Can we embrace our
feelings without the need to act on them, or to suppress and ignore
them? Can we open our hearts and bring loving attention to the conflict,
rather than being a harsh judge? Of course, all these challenging questions
are equally relevant to inner or outer conflicts.
It is crucial that our society nurture and train leaders who can deal
effectively with the above questions. In fact, for millennia there has
been the problem of how to create a peaceful society. Often it sadly
seems we are slipping backward. Nevertheless, there have been tremendous
developments in social tools and structures for enhancing dialogue and
cooperation. We have communications guidelines, such as Robert's
Rules of Order, underlying meetings from church meetings to Congress.
We have developed an impressive array of other tools, models, and social
forms: mediation, arbitration, talking circles, reflective listening,
conflict resolution, bully programs, relationship enhancement programs,
intuitive listening, community building, cross-cultural programs, diversity
trainings, the "partnership model" of Riane Eisler. We have
educators and scholars like Ron Miller (founder in 1988 of the Holistic
Education Review) who are at the forefront of educating our children
for a culture of peace. As a person works consistently on his or her
own inner peacemaking, there are at the same time many outer ways to
apply the wisdom gained, to learn processes and tools, and to develop
leadership. Wherever you are a leader, or whatever your interests, there
are ways that you personally can contribute to peacemaking.
Atlantic University is offering a new series of courses and workshops
dedicated to the development of both the inner and outer manifestations
of Leadership and Peacemaking. In the Master's Program in Transpersonal
Studies, there will be a series of courses which can be taken individually
or as a sequence. In the non-credit program, there will be a series
of one-day trainings for businesses and business leaders, which will
explore the inner and outer challenges of leadership and conflict resolution.
All courses in the Leadership and Peacemaker series will have a strong
component of inner development as part of the curriculum. The courses
will also teach practical skills, methods, and structures for creating
cooperation and harmony.
Amy Betit, M.A.., had a career as a concert composer and conductor.
At the age of 40, she was called to study psychology, and obtained a
master's degree in clinical psychology. She serves as chair of the Atlantic
University faculty and teaches several courses including "Introduction
to Transpersonal Studies," and "Creating a Meaningful Life."
Mary Elizabeth Lynch, M.A., J.D., was trained in philosophy and
law. She is a private practice attorney/mediator, and teaches courses
for Atlantic University in mediation and peacemaking. She is the founder
of A Better Alternative, a company that offers leadership and conflict
resolution training and also provides mediation services.
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